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Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Posted by Nick on 1 February 2000, 02:52 GMT

BlueCalx's Party(Reuters) CHICAGO, IL - To celebrate the otherwise meaningless revolution of the Earth about a mid-sized star, Nick Disabato held a "birthday party" for little to no reason this weekend.

For some outlandish reason, Nick felt a strange compelling to throw a party for a meaningless passage of time to occur on what people on Earth consider to be "February 1, 2000." When questioned about the matter, Nick replied, "It's my birthday. People throw parties on their birthday. It's called a birthday party."
Wow.
It's clearly apparent that Nick needs some sort of professional help.

When questioned about Nick's bout with insanity, theoretical physicist Alfred E. Neumann of the University of Chicago stated that "since all bodies travel at different speeds, whether it be the Earth or Alpha Centauri, time passes differently for each. As a result, it's logical to assume that time is merely an illusion to the viewer and that Nick Disabato must be committed to an insane asylum at once."

Ed Sim, a real-life acquaintance of Nick, agrees: "Nick is just [mess]ed up. I wouldn't trust him with anything, much less whether or not he feels he has the knowledge to determine whether or not his eighteenth 'birthday' has passed."

An average student at Maine South, Kate Ferraro, said, "It's Joey's birthday?! I HAVE TO GET HIM BALLOONS!*#&!(*#&!@)#" with the punctuation symbols and everything.
Doctors are investigating Park Ridge's water supply for signs of contamination.

 


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Happy Birthday Nick!!!!!
Cpt.Ginyu

Happy birthday to you! Happy bithday to you! Happy birthday dear Nicky! Happy birthday to you! Now treat yourself to a birthday game of tetris and a slice of birthday cake.

     1 February 2000, 03:36 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
fatman  Account Info
(Web Page)

Hey, now you can start updating agian right? I bet it was that whole being a year younger thing, wasn't it. Now you should be able to do this.

     1 February 2000, 04:02 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DWedit  Account Info
(Web Page)

unf!

     1 February 2000, 04:06 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Matthew Hernandez  Account Info
(Web Page)

ew...

Matt H.

     2 February 2000, 01:23 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Michael Brunner  Account Info
(Web Page)

SPOON!

     2 February 2000, 04:32 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Lucas  Account Info

Have an endorphine-stimulating celebration of the passing of an integral number of terrestrial revolutions about the solar orb, Nick. Say, what olfactory sensation did your gluten, sucrose, and lactic fluid mixture, heated until satisfactory tactile properties are attained (otherwise known as a CAKE) cause in that massive nose of yours? Of course, everybody either has a massive nose, a nose solely consisting of non-massive particles, or no nose at all. But that is a subject of another physics lesson.

Translation to 'normal' English:

Have a happy birthday, Nick. What flavor was your cake? I like chocolate. But that's a subject of another physics lesson.

     1 February 2000, 07:02 GMT

Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Krach42  Account Info
(Web Page)

*ahem* uh... dude... olfactory means having to do with SMELL... where in the world did you get TASTE out of that? (and yes, I looked it up just to be sure...)

     1 February 2000, 07:44 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
rabidcow
(Web Page)

are you telling him how to eat cake??

     1 February 2000, 07:50 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Rafael Castillo

Maybe it's because if you can't smell real well (such as when you have a cold), you don't taste much either. But I'm not sure...

     1 February 2000, 08:10 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Rosbif22

Maybe it's 'cause if you can't smell too good (such as when you have a cold), then you don't taste too much either...that's where the "olfactory" would come in, in my opinion. Or he could've made a mistake.

     1 February 2000, 08:12 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
tassadar25 Account Info
(Web Page)

No offence, but do you guys have any life at all whatsoever?

     1 February 2000, 14:15 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Ciaran McCreesh  Account Info
(Web Page)

May you suffer an unpleasant bout of (please ignore the spaces - the word's too long) pneumonoul tramicrosc opicsilico volcanocon iosis :P

Ciaran McCreesh
http://www.asm86.cwc.net/ for a ti86 asm tutorial.

     1 February 2000, 20:34 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
EvanMath

What does a lung disease have to do with anything?

     1 February 2000, 23:47 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
James Aguilar  Account Info

Man, why did you have to do that? Only losers use that word anymore. It's just OLD. Why don't you say the chemical formula for the Tabacco Mosaic Virus (e-mail me if you want to know).

And you spelled it wrong!

Pneumono ultra microscopic silico volcani coniosis

     2 February 2000, 03:48 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Ciaran McCreesh  Account Info
(Web Page)

That's the American spelling. It's wrong.

Ciaran McCreesh

     2 February 2000, 20:03 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Elenmiir  Account Info
(Web Page)

Bah!

May 2,4,6-trinitrotoluene rain upon you!

(I'd draw it, but I'm afraid that it'll turn out really bad...oh, what the heck.

CH3
X
/ \
O2N --X X--NO2
| |
X X
\ /
X
|
NO2

Anybody remember the formula for thalidomide? That's a cool compound... )

     3 February 2000, 05:30 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Elenmiir  Account Info
(Web Page)

Sheesh! You can't draw at all! Get off of this board!

     3 February 2000, 05:37 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
meingts Account Info

Yeah, Verdana isn't a fixed width font. :(

~WYSIWYG (~ == negation)

-meingts

     4 February 2000, 00:34 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DavidH


O
|
C
// \
O--C C--O
| ||
O--C C--O
\\ /
C
|
O

Thats a benzene ring (hee hee).
gee I really hope its a benzene ring anyway. If I'm wrong i will have to crawl into a dark cave and live out the rest of my life as alone, hiding myself from the world, alone, so alone. sigh.

     4 February 2000, 01:12 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DavidH

hey my picture didn't show up right. god damn it.

     4 February 2000, 01:56 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Lucas  Account Info

It wasn't a mistake. The only information that the sense of taste gives you it how sweet, salty, sour, or bitter something is. The sense of smell is what most people confuse for the sense of taste.

     2 February 2000, 01:31 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
ikecam  Account Info
(Web Page)

I'll second that. Most of taste is actually smell.

     3 February 2000, 02:58 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
programmer066  Account Info

Dingbats. You guys are idiots. If you can smell a cake, you'll know if it is white or chocolate. He never said anything about tasting the chocolate, just that it was chocolate.

     2 February 2000, 01:40 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DefconAlpha

Yeah, so what? Olfactory is related to smelling... Turkey Vultures have the best olfactory cells in the world, that doesn't really pertain to the subject... But, most of the *taste* of chocolate comes from the *smell* of chocolate... Try it. Eat a bite of chocolate cake. Now, hold your nose and wait a second, and try eating another bite of cake, kinda bland...

Defcon (:^)

     2 February 2000, 01:54 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DavidH

Actualy octipuses, no wait octipi, what's the plural for octipus, anyway an octipus has the best olfactory cells.

     4 February 2000, 01:16 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Elenmiir  Account Info
(Web Page)

Octopi.

     4 February 2000, 07:22 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Nick Disabato  Account Info
(Web Page)

The cake coming to me tonight will be chocolate and possibly might contain mint chocolate chip ice cream from Baskin-Robbins.

Mmmmm.....

--BlueCalx

     1 February 2000, 14:58 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Lucas  Account Info

Mint chocolate chip ice cream? That's one of my favorite flavors. Chocolate cake is also my favorite inexpensive flavor of cake. (My personal choice for a birthday cake is a chocolate cheesecake. Although, I didn't even get a cake this year :-/ )

     2 February 2000, 01:37 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
DavidH

I'm goin to Joe's Crab Shack for my birthday :-P

     4 February 2000, 01:19 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Matthew Hernandez  Account Info
(Web Page)

That place is good! I love their shirt:

Front: Got crabs?
Back: We do!

Hehe...where do you live, its only an east coast chain, right?

Matt H.

     6 February 2000, 03:48 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Chris Remo  Account Info
(Web Page)

I live in San Diego, CA, and they have one here... It used to be Crabby Joe's, now it's Joe's Crab Shack.
I've never actually been there though, just seen it. Any good?
-chrisremo

     8 February 2000, 07:48 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Celebrates Meaningless Passage Of Time With Equally Meaningless "Birthday Party"
Derrick  Account Info
(Web Page)

I went to a Joe's Crab Shack in TN before.

     13 February 2000, 03:26 GMT

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