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Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Posted by Michael on 27 September 2004, 05:14 GMT

In what has become a major media event, former ticalc.org news editor Nick Disabato has married his beloved TI-89 graphing calculator. The wedding was originally scheduled for October 16, but Nick decided to adjust the date after hearing of the recent lack of news on ticalc.org. "It was horrifying," he said, "and since 89-snookums and I were ready, we decided to take the plunge and help out ticalc.org as well!" Nick and Ms. 89 have been engaged since late July, several years after their original meeting in the electronics section of Target. Ever since the departure of his 86, Nick has been searching for a calculator that would, well...complete him in life. Now that he's found that special something, the entire ticalc.org staff wishes him the best of luck and that years of happiness may follow.

Due to the secrecy, only the couple's closest friends were invited. Magnus Hagander served as best man; Joey, Morgan, Jon, the Voyage 200, and others were also in attendance. From within the spacious lecture hall in the college math department, Nick proceeded down the wedding aisle with his bride-to-be rolling by his side in her motorized wheelchair. Shortly thereafter, they entered into the sacred bond of holy matrimony while astonished onlookers wept with uncontrollable emotions.

[Oh sweet calculator love] Details of the reception are carefully being guarded, but we were able to obtain a picture of their first kiss. Immediately following the wedding, the reception began - guests danced to Nick's own techno remixes. Joey was observed doing the funky chicken after having one too many glasses of non-alcoholic champagne. When interviewed, he commented, "Nick is such a great guy. I'm very happy for him." Nick only exclaimed something involving calculus theorems as he and Ms. 89 left the building. She would not talk to anyone, but only flashed the graph of r = 8sin(2*theta).

[mmm baby! Do you want to integrate? I'd love to be the area under your curves!] We should announce here that the TI-89 has now changed her last name in accordance with the usual custom, and will hereafter be known as Mrs. TI-Disabato. Nick and his wife are hoping for offspring within a few years. "We're hoping for ASM programs, but if we get BASIC, that's okay too," Nick commented before vanishing with his new wife into his bedroom. They are rumored to be engaging in rather passionate activities at this time.

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The comments below are written by ticalc.org visitors. Their views are not necessarily those of ticalc.org, and ticalc.org takes no responsibility for their content.


Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Teoryn  Account Info
(Web Page)

Pictures like that really need a warning. I clicked 'read more' and I got 'see more.' I feel so violated now.

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 05:54 GMT

Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Andy Janata  Account Info
(Web Page)

Yes, they are a little grotesque, in a good sort of way. :P

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 12:55 GMT

Re: Re: Seriously
ti_is_good_++  Account Info

If people access this article at school, they could be written up/suspended/expelled if the IT people intercept the transfer because of 'obscene images.' As we all know, nobody backs anybody accused of viewing 'obscene pictures' on school computers and the electronic checking would often block Google searches for 'sheet rubber.'

Reply to this comment    28 September 2004, 01:57 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
JcN  Account Info
(Web Page)

It turns me on...

Reply to this comment    30 September 2004, 00:47 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
JcN  Account Info
(Web Page)

OMG, did I just say that???

Reply to this comment    30 September 2004, 00:48 GMT

Calculator Robot?!?!?!?!!!!
gnownoskcid  Account Info

I never knew a robot that can be programed by TI calculators existed! I'm definitely gonna try to convince my math + infomation tech + physics teachers to get these ASAP!!!!

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 06:04 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Paul Houser Account Info
(Web Page)

Arn't you worried about smudging the screen licking the calculator like that? Oh wait, the slide case/clothes were still on it.

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 12:18 GMT


¤
burntfuse  Account Info

Although it *would* still get the back of the calc wet...

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 21:43 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
W Hibdon  Account Info
(Web Page)

Wow, that is sick. Wrong on so many levels, I cannot count them on one hand. Funny though.

Oh, and I do not get that graph. I graphed it and I have no idea what it is suppoded to mean.

-W-

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 14:26 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Jean-Francois geyelin  Account Info
(Web Page)

I didn't try to graph it either but my guess is that it is a heart.

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 16:14 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
gnownoskcid  Account Info

it's butterfly shaped

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 16:32 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Jake Griffin  Account Info
(Web Page)

not if you make the theta range half the amount that is set by default...then it's a heart...

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 18:21 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
W Hibdon  Account Info
(Web Page)

see, I knew that I could do some thing like that, but I could not remember.

-W-

Reply to this comment    28 September 2004, 00:51 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Barrett Anderson Account Info
(Web Page)

>>"Read More and Discuss"

more like "Read More and Disgust"

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 17:16 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
calkfreak83  Account Info
(Web Page)

I actually fell on the floor when I read this.

Reply to this comment    28 September 2004, 00:52 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
Mitch B  Account Info
(Web Page)

That is just wrong

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 19:06 GMT

¤
burntfuse  Account Info

Wow...I had heard things about the "marriage of man and machine" before, but never took them this literally... ;-) BTW, cool "wheelchair"!

This has to be the best fake news article yet!!!

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 21:40 GMT

Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
saitei Account Info

That just ain't right.

Reply to this comment    27 September 2004, 22:46 GMT


Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
calkfreak83  Account Info
(Web Page)

My God, it's a miracle!!!
...Another southerner...

(: I am not alone :)

Reply to this comment    28 September 2004, 02:08 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
solitaire710 Account Info

your dang right your not alone....dixie!
and i thought i was alone....5d

Reply to this comment    28 September 2004, 03:20 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
saitei Account Info

Yes, I'm from Mississippi. I'm not exactly proud of it, but hey, you are who you are.

Reply to this comment    29 September 2004, 03:42 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
calkfreak83  Account Info
(Web Page)

I'm from Meridian. :)

Reply to this comment    29 September 2004, 19:40 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Nick Disabato Marries TI-89
saitei Account Info

I'm from the Hattiesburg area, going to Jones County Junior College.

Reply to this comment    1 October 2004, 00:32 GMT

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