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ticalc.org Completes IPO
Posted by Michael on 1 April 2004, 00:50 GMT

As many of you know, it costs quite a bit of money to run a website with the astounding level of traffic that we receive. In order to raise enough funds to cover next year's bandwidth expenses, we are pleased (actually, overwhelmingly excited) to announce that ticalc.org has just completed its initial public offering of stock.

We are now traded as a nonprofit corporation on the electronic communications network Archipelago. This allows for 24-hour, real time trades under the ticker symbol CALCS. Our initial public float was 1,000,000 shares at a par value of $0.25 each.

Because of unexpected demand, as of the time of this writing, we expect Isaac to place first in the list of the world's wealthiest people, with a net worth of $76 billion. Magnus is second with a current worth of $43 billion. We have created a stock ticker (quotes delayed 15 minutes) with the current ticalc.org price:

CALCS: $

We thank all of you for investing in us, and hope to continue to serve the community for many more years now!
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The comments below are written by ticalc.org visitors. Their views are not necessarily those of ticalc.org, and ticalc.org takes no responsibility for their content.


Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Geek_Productions Account Info
(Web Page)

Must buy stock...
And hurry, as price is so low...

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 00:53 GMT

Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Geek_Productions Account Info
(Web Page)

Already up to $2 from the $1.20 a few seconds ago..
I've made $8!

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 00:55 GMT

Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

up over $5 now...

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:00 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Geek_Productions Account Info
(Web Page)

Cha-Ching!
(By the way, nice Javascript in the article.)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:06 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

Hehe, interesting... ;-) But it's not April 1st yet (at least not in EST)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:12 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Geek_Productions Account Info
(Web Page)

I know, but $up3r $t0cks 4 Ch33p had such a good price...
(Yes, I am joking.)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:25 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Chivo  Account Info

It's now below $-315!

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:06 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
DWedit  Account Info
(Web Page)

Then your computer clock is set very incorrectly.
Go to www.time.gov or some place to set your clock correctly.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:08 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

hehe...I went to time.gov and found that my watch was set EXACTLY right! that pretty cool. I set my watch about 5 yrs ago to an atomic clock in Utah... ;)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:15 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Matt M Account Info

Um, it dosn't matter, all atomic clocks [here] are set by radio control to Bolder (or is it Denver?), Colorado, USA. Or at least that's what the "quick start guide" said that came with mine.

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 16:55 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

Um...you don't own an atomic clock. It's just SET to an atomic clock using radio frequencies, but that not even accurate because of the delay in the radio waves...time.gov is accurate to within 0.2 seconds according to the web page...

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 17:37 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Matt M Account Info
(Web Page)

OK, now I will pick apart your message:

1. the "time.gov" website is accurate within 0.7 seconds
2. the clocks that set to the radio frequency are not atomic but I think it was somthing like 1/100 sec. accuracy but anyhow, ARE MORE ACCURATE THAN THE WEB SITE.

If you still want to argue, I can send you a screenshot from my computer to show that I am right on both of these topics.

-Matt M
Fredericksburg, Virginia, USA, Eastern Time -05:00, Planet Earth, The Milky Way, Outer Space

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

FYI - a little quote from a online manual for a atomic clock/alarm clock (don't believe me? Pg 2 at the link):

"WWVB radio station is located in Ft. Collins, Colorado, and transmits the exact time signal continuously throughout the United States at 60 kHz. The signal can be received up to 2, 000 miles away through the internal antenna in the Moon Phase Clock. However, due to the nature of the EarthÂ’s Ionosphere, reception is very limited during daylight hours. The Moon Phase Alarm will search for a signal every night when reception is best. The WWVB radio station derives its signal from the NIST Atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado. A team of atomic physicists is continually measuring every second, of every day, to an accuracy of ten billionths of a second per day. These physicists have created an international standard, measuring a second as 9,192,631,770 vibrations of a Cesium-133 atom in a vacuum. This Moon Phase Alarm is regulated by the WWVB transmitter."

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 21:19 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Matt M Account Info

Hey, I set my date to April 2, 2099, at 7:02 AM Eastern Time and WOW!

CALCS: $ 4497050.51
Change: 1798820104%

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 22:07 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Chivo  Account Info

Never mind. It's because it's still March 31st where I am, and the "stock" price is based on the viewer's time (and my clock says 8:00AM because the timezone is wrong :-).

"XP is an emoticon, not an acronym" -- seen on /.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:18 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Chivo  Account Info

...and I was changing my clock to see what affect is has on the stock price. :-P

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 01:20 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

BUYBUYBUYBUY!!! They are PAYING US to BUY THEIR STOCK!!! BUYBUYBUYBUY!! lol....this was a very good joke...

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 04:09 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Matt M Account Info

Geez, it's dropping like a rock! Oh, well, anyway, I just got my laptop back from having the "main pc board" replaced because it was working correctly and the technition thought it was defective (if it ain't broke, DO fix it?) since the mouse driver was corrupted and I cured it by re-formatting the hard drive and restoring my files...

...oh, right, anyway it's now at:

CALCS: $ -1147680.16
Change: -459072164%

I guess no one set the clock for me:
January 2, 1980
6:29 AM GMT

So can I get $1147680.16 paid to me for buying and have to pay money to sell?

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 21:37 GMT


Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Ivan Papusha  Account Info
(Web Page)

Now why did you people not do something like that for PI day?

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 02:52 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

Because pi_day != april_fools_day :)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 22:32 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

That's improper style. It's:
pi.getDay() != aprilFools.getDay()

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 15:55 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
CajunLuke Account Info

They're public variables, duh.

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 16:53 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

Exactly. And public variables are bad style. Just look in the java style manusl.

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 17:38 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

Heh, I always thought making everything public would be a lot easier, since you wouldn't have to make those accessor and mutator methods to return and/or edit the values of variables-- you could just do object.variable = value; rather than object.setVariable( value) ... I hate OOP :-\

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 22:28 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

That trogdor game that I made that I mentioned on my xanga site (see link) was actually an assignment to edit someone elses code to add more features, and I turned a guy's dragon into the trogdor game. However, to get to the point of this post, the guy had used all public variables and had even made a Global.class so that he could use global variables. It was THE biggest pain in the wordl to modify, and when I had to split up the file into separate files, that made it even harder. I had to change EVERY variable to private, make accessor and mutation functions for EVERY ONE OF THEM, change a TON of the methods so that they passed in the "Peasants" to the "Trogdor" and vice versa, and completely eliminate the global class...It was QUITE painstaking. Oh, and I know that the "politically correct" term is "method" and not "function," but I am just way too used to saying "function."

Reply to this comment    3 April 2004, 02:36 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
rich_ambassador  Account Info

Making variables private is never a requirement since the public, protected, and private keywords are checked by a preprocessor. The keywords never actually make it to the code generation part of the compiler because they are there just there to allow the maker of the class to restrict access to various variables from the user.

Also, critisizing someones style is crap. Some dolts think that in java the "proper" way to get functions from packages is to import each one of them separately instead of just importing the whole package. This is pure BS.

Anyways when programming a calculator there is no OOP and if you are trying to optimize a program for size then using two public variables is obviously preferable to using two class variables.

My programming vocab for java might not be correct because I never learned more then the basics of it. I prefer C++

Reply to this comment    18 April 2004, 22:38 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Ivan Papusha  Account Info
(Web Page)

>>I hate OOP

Hah! Now at least someone agrees with me. Yes, yes, I know, OOP is the greatest thing since the Floppy Drive, but OOP is meant for people that don't have time to waste programming. As for me, I prefer the structured C capabilities, but I still go with C++ because it's more forgiving and I always have the option of using the OOP uselessness.

Reply to this comment    3 April 2004, 16:34 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

But what if I did this beforehand?

pi_day = pi.getDay();
april_fools_day = aprilFools.getDay();

Unless you are referring to the underscores in the variable names...

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 22:23 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

Yes, the underscores and the non-capitalization of Fools and both Day's

Reply to this comment    3 April 2004, 02:37 GMT

Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Ivan Papusha  Account Info
(Web Page)

How in the world did you post only 3 minutes after the topic was created?

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 02:56 GMT


Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Geek_Productions Account Info
(Web Page)

I got lucky and checked the site at just the right time.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 03:59 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Ben Cherry  Account Info
(Web Page)

I've had that happen before where i hit refresh and there is a new poll, or a new article, but i dont think ive ever actually posted on them at that point.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 06:07 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

I've done that quite a few times too :)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 22:32 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Sam3.14 Account Info

Me too

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 01:00 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Joe Pena  Account Info
(Web Page)

sooner or later.... if you're addicted to this site like me, it's bound to happen

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 05:02 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Matt M Account Info

I'd say I'm addicted but I'm never on when that happens. Although, I am only on the internet a bit on weekends and on weekdays from 3-5 PM EDT.

Oh, well, maybe some day I will be able to say that I did.

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 22:36 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
KermMartian Account Info
(Web Page)

Happy April Fools Day! Check out Cemetech (http://www.cemetech.tk) :)

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 20:59 GMT

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
mindstorm23 Account Info

Not very convincing since "be" is misspelled in the article. But good one anyway.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 22:38 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
no_one_2000_  Account Info
(Web Page)

The "white" text you had there under the message on your pop-up window was pretty visible on my monitor.

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 22:45 GMT


Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
jrock7286  Account Info
(Web Page)

mine too...You should have just had javascript of something to SLOWLY fade that text in so that by the time they are finished reading, they could just BARELY see it...

Reply to this comment    2 April 2004, 15:56 GMT


Re: Re: ticalc.org Completes IPO
Dan Ferrara Account Info

<sigh> people these days... First deviantart.com is taken over by the bloody British and ticalc.org members are the wealthiest poops in the world...great joke, though

Reply to this comment    1 April 2004, 20:26 GMT

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