Re: A82: Drawing a box
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Re: A82: Drawing a box
On Thu, 16 Apr 1998 22:48:35 EDT ADAMMAN106 <ADAMMAN106@aol.com> writes:
>
>In a message dated 98-04-16 22:37:18 EDT, you write:
>
>> I also have a question for you: Are you related to the Rosenbergs who
were hung (only Americans to be killed in peacetime) for passing on
nuclear bomb information to the Soviets which in turn started the Cold
War?
>
>uuuuummmmmmmmmmmmm...
>
>~Adamman
Thanks for the ideas guys. As for your question, the answer is yes. In
fact, I sometimes help my dad tinker on the one we keep in our basement.
Here are 10 easy steps to building your own thermonuclear device:1.
First, obtain about 50 pounds (110 kg) of weapons grade Plutonium at your
local supplier. A nuclear power plant is not recommended, as large
quantities of missing Plutonium tends to make plant engineers unhappy. I
suggest that you contact your local terrorist organization, or perhaps
the Junior Achievement in your neighborhood.2. Please remember that
Plutonium, especially pure, refined Plutonium, is somewhat dangerous.
Wash your hands with soap and warm water after handling the material, and
don't allow your children or pets to play in it or eat it. Any left over
Plutonium dust is excellent as an insect repellant. You may wish to keep
the substance in a lead box if you can find one in your local junk yard,
but an old coffee can will do nicely.3. Fashion together a metal
enclosure to house the device. Most common varieties of sheet metal can
be bent to disguise this enclosure as, for example, a briefcase, a lunch
pail, or a Buick. Do not use tinfoil.4. Arrange the Plutonium into two
hemispherical shapes, separated by about 4 cm. Use rubber cement to hold
the Plutonium dust together.5. Now get about 100 pounds (220 kg) of
trinitrotoluene (TNT). Gelignite is much better, but messier to work
with. Your helpful hardware man will be happy to provide you with this
item.6. Pack the TNT around the hemisphere arrangement constructed in
step 4. If you cannot find Gelignite, feel free to use TNT packed in with
Play-Doh or any modeling clay. Colored clay is acceptable, but there is
no need to get fancy at this point.7. Enclose the structure from step 6
into the enclosure made in step 3. Use a strong glue such as "Crazy Glue"
to bind the hemisphere arrangement against the enclosure to prevent
accidental detonation which might result from vibration or mishandling.8.
To detonate the device, obtain a radio controlled (RC) servo mechanism,
as found in R.C. model airplanes and cars. With a modicum of effort, a
remote plunger can be made that will strike a detonator cap to effect a
small explosion. These detonator caps can be found in the electrical
supply section of your local supermarket. I recommend the "Blast-O-Matic"
brand because they are no deposit-no return.9. Now hide the completed
device from the neighbors and children. The garage is not recommended
because of high humidity and the extreme range of temperatures
experienced there. Nuclear devices have been known to spontaneously
detonate in these unstable conditions. The hall closet or under the
kitchen sink will be perfectly suitable.10. Now you are the proud owner
of a working thermonuclear device! It is a great ice-breaker at parties,
and in a pinch, can be used for national defense.Final note: Unless you
are a retard, you will know I was just joking. The 10 steps above were
taken from The Journal of Irreproducible Results. :D
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